July 22nd 2018
for the first time in a long i had a meaningful conversation from someone who cares. others have relied the same awareness about what’s tearing and eroding me from the inside. everyone meant well. but it was this call that opened my eyes to the biggest thought/problem that ails me. i understand Ii have a very long road ahead. the chapter of my pre-adulthood has ended. a new one has begun and i know it’s going to take all my strength physically, emotionally, and mentally to successfully turn the pages. i know i am going to make mistakes. i’m going to break down in to an emotional whirlwind. that’s who i am. it’s what i do when i’m feeling confused or overwhelmed. disheartened or at the pit of a darkened forgotten well.
what do i need to do to take control of this situation?
i need to remind myself that i am imperfect. shit happens. life goes on. and no matter what is happening i have a choice. no matter how elating or grim they may be, i have a choice. and that choice dictates my emotions.